Six Beers and a Lemondrop (courtesy of my manners)

So listen up bitches...I. am. awesome.  I got my friends and myself a free shot tonight because when I ordered a Bud Light I said, "A Bud Light please." The bartender was so freaking amazed that I said please he gave us all Lemondrops. There is something seriously wrong with this city if a simple "Please" gets you a free shot. In other news, I now know how to get free shots.

So we were there for a bit and then moved on. Oh, btw, I should add that I didn't go out until 1am. Whoops! Anyfreeshots...we went to another bar after that and the bartender was a dick. He was nice to me because his girlfriend was from Cape Giuardo (WTF who is from there)(It's a town about two hours away from Saint Louis for those of you not from MO...nubes) and then yelled at me when I was like "WTF who is from there?" So Christy bitched him out for sucking and then we went to yet another bar.

This bar was AWESOME. Why? Because the music they played was pleasing to my ears. It was a blend of Motown and Eighties, which in my opinion is the best blend EVER. Anycomeoneileen, the music was a pleasant distraction until we realized we were in the middle of a GUIDO BACHELOR PARTY. I'm going to let you take a minute for that to sink in. BTW, if you don't know what a Guido is, please follow the link for a reference.

One word: FAIL

ALSO, some guy BIT MY FACE. I have no explanation. He literally just walked up to me, bit my face and then walked away. This made more sense once we realized we were in the middle of a FUCKING GUIDO BACHELOR PARTY. Sick.

Also, I miss the Midwest. And my family. And my friends. Whompity whomp whomp.